PURE FUCKING EVIL

World of Porncraft, anyone? Yes, yes-- though I might be out of the game, that doesn't stop me from making fun of it.

There's a single thread on the boards that has confused the living fuck out of me, and I've decided it needs to be explored.

I present to you: Hunters and their pets! (All animals World of Warcraft simualted, and 100% not real.)


"Beastmistresses Ada and Ilara were Azeroth's finest animal trainers. No hunters ever before commanded the loyalty from their pets these two could. In their hands, even the most unruly beast could be turned content and obedient, and under its new temperament, could be raised as a champion. "

Aww shit. Here we go.


"The spore bats were one of Ilara's favorites. Once they got a taste of her pussy, they'd come back for more, even if it meant sharing with a couple others at once. Their comparatively small cocks were also perfect for oral, and their jizz had a rather sweet taste to it, too. With four in her cooch, one in each hand, and one in her mouth, she could build loyalty on seven at once. "

Here's what gets me about the entire thing.

Is it sick? Yes. Is it goofy? Yes.

But you can't even tell what the fuck's going on in the picture! It sure as hell isn't what's said in the description!


"Ada's turtle sessions were some of the toughest, though she loved them just as well. Sometimes, for hours on end the same beast would pump her full of goo, as if to prove that he owned her to the line of turtles behind him, patiently awaiting their own turn to exhibit their dominance."

I envision this line in the same way I imagine a line at the bank.


"No beast was a wilder fuck than the gorilla. Only after she had been blown wide by other animals could she take the giant heaves on the primates' ungainly meat rod. Like a gooey pair of fleshy window drapes sagging between her legs was how they would leave her hole, so for her other animals, it would be a good while before it wasn't like fucking the Deeprun Tunnel with a banana."

That first sentence hurts my brain.

Also: UNGAINLY MEAT ROD, GOOEY FLESHY WINDOW DRAPES.


"Boars had to be tamed one at a time. Very dominant by nature, they would fight tooth and nail for sole ownership of the female in question. Ilara's method was foolproof -- first let him mount her rear like a proper sow, then as the boar filled her with seed, marking his ownership of her, she could pin him on his back and milk his balls dry. A single virile male could easily have a couple hours worth spooge to drain, and only when completely exhausted would he submit to his mistress. "

I wonder how this guy thinks the world works.

Does he think sex is:

Step 1.) Woman bends over
Step 2.)
Step 3.) GALLONS OF SEMEN

Is that how it is?

Also, uh, that image of a woman humping a pig.

Yeah.

I'm sorry, what the fuck?

I'm sensing three things from this author (who is a dude):

1.) He likes bestiality
2.) He likes REALLY loose vaginas
3.) He thinks everybody has 50 gallons of semen to work with

Odd.


"Ada found that while her vagina was far too blown out for a crocolisk, if she coated her asshole with the female's secretions, she could still befriend the most ornery of males in seconds flat."

No comment.


"Male warp stalkers were extraordinarily dominant over females, and several would often corner a mate and mount her mercilessly in turn. Ilara's night elf vagina was nowhere near as resilient as a warp stalker female's, but her anus was plenty capable of taking on the never-ending line of well-hung, sex-hungry beasts."

HER ANUS

Also, did you ever think: "I think that Warp Stalker is female"? I didn't!
Also, how does one corner a goddamn Warp Stalker? THEY CAN TELEPORT!


"Ilara had a particular connection with the bears, and with feral lust they ravaged her asshole until it was nothing but a gaping, fetid repository of ursine spunk. Though her long-wilted rosebud hung but lazily to even the very largest bear cock, the carnal stench that clung to it always charged his member with the bestial vigor to press on into her till she had squeezed out every last drop of sperm. "

URSINE SPUNK

There are words that should not be seen together. Ever.

Long-wilted rosebud? What the fuckity shit?

What the-- fuck it, I don't give a shit anymore.


"These two huntresses always enjoyed training the canines together. For reasons unknown even to them, the hyenas went straight for Ada's ass, and the wolves immediately took to Ilara's cunt. It was like a game to them all. Rather than engage in the territorial behavior that made them so difficult to train, and perhaps taking a cue from the lip-locked elves; spiritedly, ferociously, yet cooperatively, the animals all had their way with their hole of choice, one after the other."

Spiritedly.

Like it's a goddamn renaissance fair.


"Training a raptor always involved a little extra. After slathering her pussy with a copious amount of putrid raptor pheromones, Ada could only then present herself to a male. With her face in the dirt and her ass in the air, she'd hold her pink prize wide open as the scent of a potential mate finally caught his interest. The pheromones would turn that hole into a bullseye, and nothing would pacify this stud till he had drowned out the stench with gallons of cum."

The word "copious" has been used so fucking much for substances I don't want to touch that it makes me ill when I see it now.


Alright, there's tons more, but I don't wanna fucking parse all this romance novel text bullshit.

Let's just go to the worst thing I've seen:


Thrall.

Being fucked by a wolf.

...

His pubic hair and orc dick did not help matters.


The best, this run, however, had to be a purple-skinned Draenei lady with tits the size of her head.

That was nice.

Other than that, nothing really good.

If you wanted to kill yourself, there were some pictures of World of Warcraft characters swallowing tauren shit straight out of their moocow asses.

I passed on those.

Yes, I know, there's no comic for Friday.

I have it, I just haven't got the time or the gumption to post it.

And yes, there's a comic for Monday.

Anyway, Porncraft!


Newest developments:

More nude female dwarves.

Yes. Just what we've all been waiting for.

Here's a tip, people: the whole "without cum" and "with cum" image set idea? Yeah, never really flew.

You can stop doing it now.

Also: realistic male groin hair.

You can stop that shit. There is nothing sexy about pubes that extend to your chest.

What else-- oh yeah! The disproportionately high level of bestiality artwork! Wow, people must think of fucking their pets a LOT.

Moonkin I can see. Even ravagers. But... cats and dogs?

Really?


There's a lot of gnome pictures. Once again.

Serious... gnome... pornography.

I'm scared.

Strangest of all would probably be the commissions. Every other picture I see says this:

"Hi, this is a commission for [insert name here]".

And the artwork sucks. So, that means, somebody paid for a crayon drawing.

Also, what the fuck's with the pictures of spiders fucking women?


Hey!
Look!

Fred Perry artwork!

And it's not erotic in any manner!

Hooray!


The thing that disappoints me about the World of Porncraft is how, while it's updated, it sure as hell doesn't have a lot of new shit.

And when it DOES have new shit, none of it is jerkable in the least.

That Chinese guy's super artwork is good, though.

I figured I haven't looked at Darknest in awhile, and I should go see what the hell's going on over there.

So, here we go.


We have:

1.) Horrifically muscular ugly nude orc women
2.) A horribly drawn picture of a naked dwarf woman in the santa outfit
3.) Icky-looking bondage
4.) "Rub a dub dub, three men in a tub" OH GOD

OH GOD

OH

OH GOD

MY FUCKING EYES

5.) Really badly drawn pictures of Succubi
6.) Netherdrake porn
7.) Female tauren lesbian porn.

That's right.

Moocow porn.

...

My dick is confused.

Tits + Moocow head = wha?

OOH OOH VASHJ PORN

And it's GOOOOOOOOOOD!

Good Vashj porn!
That'll... yeah.

That'll do, pig.

That'll do.


Where was I?

Oh yeah.

The best porn here...

... HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH WOW!

Shuggah the Shaman = spiffy.

Badly drawn... more badly drawn porn...


8.) OH GOD DWARF FEMALE LESBIAN PORN

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AND IT'S REALISTICALY DRAWN

OH FUCK NOW I'M -NEVER- GOING TO GET THAT OUT OF MY HEAD


9.) Anthropomorphic hellhound getting fucked by an octopus.

I'm dead serious.


That's it for now.

As for me, it's VASHJ TIME!

I've noticed something about myself.

I visit the wide World of Porncraft every month. To the day.

Weird.

Apparently, that's how much time it takes my brain to heal from this sort of mental trauma, so that's good to know.

What do we have this month?


Let's see: somebody drew a draenei's cock.

It has tentacles like their chin does.

I will never be the same.


Let's see... somebody being raped by pink feathery octopi with bird beaks...

... person being raped is a red dog-girl with a dog head...

... and human tits... uh...


Oftentimes, I read the comments leave when they view porn, seeing it as being a form of anthropological study.

I know people are dumb when they look at porn, but most of them are also self-righteous and very critical of most pornography.

Comments such as "hey, her nipple doesn't appear to be in the right place" when they look at drawn pornography kind of makes me wonder how they ever jerk off.

"Isn't her pussy a little big?" "You drew the arms wrong!"

"She doesn't look like a hobgoblin!"

...

"We need more pet porn!"

Wait, what?


Lemme just add something horrific to the entire "DO NOT WANT" list:

Draenei males.

No.

Noooooo.

Especially not gay and naked.

Nooooooooooooooo.

While I do occasionally enjoy furry porn, furry female tauren are... not really that sexy.

I'd hit that, but... just... there's something fundamentally wrong with wanting to screw something -that furry-, in my mind.


"Mmmmm... tails and wet pussy. Yeeeeeees!"

Not exactly my idea of a good time, but that varies among freaks.


Here's an image description:

" Zombie SeXXorz [gay][necro]
Someone was mentioning a lack of Forsaken when it came to sexing. But let me assure you, Forsaken are HOT. Rawr. Yes, he's wearing his dagger. lol Yes, he's wearing a mask (the Forsaken in question during this RP was missing his lower jaw, which was kind of a mood-killer!)"

Let's take a look at it.

sound of the Ark of the Covenant opening




Just another realization of mine:

People find the Undead to be sexy because they're pretty much the American standard of beauty. Skinny as hell.


Oh, look. A gay warlock with his Incubus.

And he's the bottom.

MR. WIZARD, GET ME THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!


Here's a comment about a gay picture.

"The more lesbian it is, the more attention and higher rating things get on this site (look at the adjacent picture, Mana tap). Don't put too much thought into what rating people give, the above posters are correct..

Some comments:
1) Where the lower portion of the forsaken's right arm (his right) ends is a little too hard-edged, it gives it somewhat of a cylinder/polygonal look. The upper portion's blending is more irregular and looks better.
2) The reflectivity of the forsaken's skin texture seems a bit high, there's a sheen in his upper-left arm just above the elbow (it could be sweat on a living character, but undead are incapable of that).

I have a theory.

If you can ejaculate, I think you might be able to sweat.

Call me crazy. The dead also bleed. Why is sweating not allowed?


3) Very good job on the cum, liquids can be hard

canned laughter


4) The shadows around the lamp seem rather hard-edged, it draws the eye away from the central emphasis. If this is intentional to create a jarring feeling of off-balance (due to one character being undead) that makes sense. If you don't want to draw too much focus away you might try adding some more lights around the lamp, object-linked only to the lamp, to illuminate its shadows slightly. If you're using Maya, I've also found a subtle Glow effect on the bulb (or in this case the surrounding white sphere) looks nice for bright light sources."

I only saw one thing.

Two dudes.

Only an artist could go, "Wow, the shadows are too hard-edged" when you have an elf and a dead dude fucking.


Oftentimes, I begin to wonder what separates me from these people. And, I think I have some idea.

I'm pretty much open to anybody wanting to fuck -anybody-, so long as it doesn't violate the following rules-- and these are rules for drawings:

1.) There must not be a size difference that looks creepy,
2.) Both parties must look sexually mature (it's a drawing, after all)
3.) No violence (drawing blood during sex? Ew.)

and finally:

4.) For the love of God, no ugly ass men fucking each other.

That's just wrong. You're drawing them, at least make them pretty.


And I'm through.

So I went back.

And I tell ya... the entire "give us a donation and we'll give you a free porn comic book" thing?

Yeah.

It's still not done.

It's still deeply lesbian, though, so, if you wear flannel, enjoy motorcycling and hate everything male, you'll enjoy it. Still, it's a bit annoying for people with dicks, as evidenced in the comments left on the pages.

Also! People want taurens and gay male sex to be put into it.

"Needs moar male. Tauren couldn't hurt, either. ~.^"

Ow.


"Needs more whatever-the-hell-Beastess-wants! That... and feet >_>"

OWWWWWW.


"As a totally hetro guy, I love lesbian art. Keep it up."

OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW


In addition to two mind-numbingly vanilla lesbo pages of the comic put out since I've been gone (which, as the author has stated, have been delayed by 'humidity reports'(?!) and 'my wedding', which makes me wonder once again what kind of relationships people who draw this stuff actually have), there is, but of course, more porn no one asked for nor wants.

Female dwarves.

Naked.

No.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Naked male draenei.

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

People: if you can't fucking draw, DON'T FUCKING DRAW PORN.

No! NO GODDAMMIT NO!


In other news, the lesbo porn comic book?

Drawn by a woman.

shudder

Haaaraghrh!

You thought your wife was weird? Bullshit!


And I would like to say to the gay male peoples: CAN'T YOU FIND ANOTHER OUTLET FOR YOUR SEXUALITY OTHER THAN GODDAMN TROLL MALES?! Goddamn! That shit is CREEPY! AND EVERYBODY, QUIT WITH THE NUDE GNOMES! THAT SHIT IS DISGUSTING!

"She's a virgin! Quick! FUCKPILE HER!"

...

"Her breasts are like cannons ready to shoot >.<"

I thought Trade was bad.

"very cute, she could suck my cock all day"

Does anybody really say, "that woman could not suck my cock all day"?


And here's a picture entitled "Tauren Twincest".

Incest.

With twins!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1


RUN AWAY

There is no end to the strange shit you'll find in the World of Porncraft.

As I've stated before: loads and loads of bestiality. Most of it ruining otherwise good pictures.

Look! A draenei and a tauren fucking! And... oh, there's a raptor raping the tauren. Son of a...

Then you get just plain weird things, like, Yoshi from Super Mario licking Peach's ass for some strange reason.


I'll say this: even though it's all so weird, I wouldn't mind it if I couldn't read people's comments.

Like this one under a picture:

"Came. Thanks."

That throws me into a whole new world of pain.

"Beast sex ftw!!! :D"

Yeah.

"We need Murloc porn"

Oh God...

But yeah; there's Murloc porn.

God save us all.

"request NE gettin head from NE female,human female,BE female,dreanei female,troll female"

Somebody's greedy...


So, the travesties I've found today:

FEMALE LEPER GNOMES BEING EATEN OUT BY TROGGS OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


A MALE GNOME FUCKING A MALE TAUREN

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH


Temperatureplay.

I don't even wanna fucking know what that is.


Gay troll rape.

I have lost the will to live.

So, the gallery's back up, and it's high time I investigated some more.


You wanna know what the community is like?

One of the most viewed picture is a badly drawn one of a troll female being mounted (not even visibly!) by a large... dog-like... wolf thing.

It's not that good a drawing, anyway.

I understand a lot of what goes on here.

I understand things like, hey; Lady Vashj and a female version of Illidan lezzing it up.

I can dig that.

I can dig naked Draenei females and naked Orc females and pretty much any naked female in general, but, uh...

... when you bring ogres and male tauren-- shit, even FEMALE tauren-- into this, you lose me.

And why the goblins?


The other thing I have a problem with, in general, in regards to the entire community, is, everytime somebody starts drawing people fucking... they want donations!

Early on in icze4r.org's development, I was toying with the idea of opening up a donation box.

Upon further thought about it, I have decided: no.

It's not happening.

Ever.

Well, unless I'm gonna be homeless if I don't. But none of this "No, we'll never sell our company to Microsoft" bullshit like Bungie said.


Anyway, as I was saying: my problem.

My problem is, they had this campaign:

Donate and you get a free comic!

Here's the problem.

The comic is posted in the public image gallery.

Anybody can look at it.

What's the point?

If you get a bound copy of it, you're only going to get it sticky! Come on, people! Think!


Plus, the damn thing doesn't appear to be done yet. So, we'll get our comic as soon as it's done?

See, this is why I never commission porn! It takes FOREVER!


The entire tag list has grown. Not by much, but it has.

The taglist, in its entirety:

#6 | , | - | . | 2 | 11 | 3d | 3some | 3some, | 3way | 40k | [beast] | [bondag] | [color] | [cum] | [heter][reluct] | [hetro] | [lesb] | [tentacles] | abomination | abs | ackanime | acquaintances | action | after | alice | alleyra | alliance | alliance, | amazon | amy | anal | anal, | and | andariel | angel | anime | anthro | apoch | apoch, | archer, | archmage | armour | art | ashelin | ass | axe | azasuke | back | background | ball | ballgag | bang | banshee | bat | bath | batman | battle | bbq | beads | beast | beastess | beauty | beer | behind | belf | bellandy | bend | bestiality | between, | bigbewbs | bizarre | bizzare | bj | blackchain | blackwingavatar, | blades | blaze | blizzard | blonde | blood | bloodelf | bloodelf, | bloodelves, | bloodfang | bloodsail | blow | blowjob | blowjob, | blue | bondage | bondage, | boob | boobs | booty | boy | bra | branch | breast | breasts | breed | brown | bruises | brunette | bukkake | burning | butt | c'thun | candle | candles | capture | captured | caster | cat | catgirl | cea | cea, | centaur | chain | chains | chaman | champion | chamy | cheeks | chick | christmas | clothed | cobra | cobras | cock | collared | color | color, | colored | coloured | comedy | comic | comic, | computer | conjure | control | cookie | corrupt | cosplay | cow | crimson | crop | crossfaction | crusade | cuffs | cum | cum, | cumshot | cunt | cunt, | cute | d&d | d/s | daisy | damned | dance | dark | darkranger | darnassus | dawnoftheend | dead | death | deep | deeprun | demon | demon, | demons | derriere | devil | devils | diablo | diabloii | dick | dickgirl | dildo | dl | doa | doggie | doggy | doggystyle | doggystyle, | doomwhisperer, | double | dp | draenai | draenai, | draenei | draenei, | draenie | dragon | drake | dranei | dreanai | dreania | dripping | drow | drownedmage | druid | druid, | druid,nightelf, | drunken | dryad | dunmer | durotar | dwarf | dwarven | dwarven, | dyad | eggs | elf | elf, | elfe | eligor | elves | elves, | enjoy | erudite | everquest | exotic | explaination | facial | facial, | fairies | fairy | fan | fang | fantasy | fantasy, | fel | felhunter | felorc, | felwood | female | femmeslash | fenwick | ff12 | ff7 | ffm | fight | final | final, | finalfantasy | finger | finger, | fingers | fire | fishing | fishoil | food | foot | footjob | forest | forsaken | fran | fred | frot | frottage | fuck | fuck, | funny | furblog | furbolgs | furry | futa | futanari | fute | gag | gangbang | gangbang, | gank | ganked, | garnet | garuda | gay | ghost | gif | girl | girl, | girls | gnoll | gnome | gnome, | gnome. | gnomes | goblin | goblins | gold | goo | gore | green | grey | grope | group | group, | guild | guy | gwendraeth | hair | half | halloween | handcuffs | handjob | harpy | hayami | healer | heccy | hell | herm | highheels | hoof | horde | horde, | horns | horse | hot | human | human, | humans, | humor | humor, | hunter | huntress | ii | illidan | illithid | imp | incest | incubus | incubus, | infernal | ink | invisible | iscah | iscah, | ivy | jaheira | jak | jason | jeeeeeenkins | jewelry | jizz | job | juhani | jungle | kaleeb | keira | kerrigan | kissing | kittens | knights | kobold | kotor | krystal | lactation | latex | laude | leather | leeroooooooooooooooooooooooooy | legs | lelah, | lesb | lesbian | lesbian, | lesbians | lfg | licania | licking | lineart | link | lizards | lol | loola | love, | mage | mage, | magic | magic, | maiev | mail | male | man | mana | manacles | manga | manga, | marstan | masterbation | masterbation, | masturbate | masturbating | masturbation | mating | me | me, | mechanical | mikomi | milk | mind | minotaur | missionary | mithra | mithra, | mograine | monestary | moneyshot | monster | moon | moonkin | moonwell | mount | muscle | muscles | music | mutio | mxm | my | nadou | naga | naga, | naked | nature | nbl | ne | necro | necromancy | nedivah, | neeshka | nelf | never | night | nightelf | nightelf, | nightelf2 | nightelves | nightelves, | nights | ninja | noin | nova | nsq | nude | nude, | nwalca | nymphs | oblivion | of | ogre | ohri | omg | on | onyxia | ooo | oral | orc | orc, | orcess | orcs | orgrimmar, | orgy | out | outdoor | outdoor, | outlaw | over | owlbeast | paladin | palemane | palmer | parts, | peach | penetrate | penetrate, | penetration | penis | perry | pet | phiala | photoshop | piercing | piercings | pin-up | pinup | pinup, | pirate | plant | plants | poison | pokemon | ponytail | popabear | pose | pot | pregnant | priest | priest, | priestess, | punish | purple | pussy | quest | races | races, | ragnarok | rain | rain2 | ranger | rape | rape, | ravager | red | redhead | reluct | rise | rogue | rogue, | rogues | rogues, | romance | romantic | romantic, | rope | rose | rouge | run | ryari | rylea | saber | saberfang | saph | sapphiroh | sapphiron | saria | satin | satyr | sauce | scarlet | scarlet, | scholar | scourge | screen | screenshot | scythe | sel | selanaar | semiclothed | seviar | sex | sex, | sexeh | sexi | sexy | shadow | shaman | shamen | shamy | shemale | shirtless | shot | silly | sinijara, | sisters_of_battle | six | skeleton | sketch | slash | slave | smoke | smoking | snake | snowblind | softcore, | solo | some | sorcerer | sorceress | spanking | spare | spell | sperm | spirit, | spooge | spread | staff | stairs | stalking | star | starcraft | starfox | stitches | straight | straight, | strange | stranglethorn, | strap-on | strapon | strip | stripper | stripper, | submarine | succubi | succubus | succubus, | suck | suckubus | suggestive | summer, | summon | sunset | superman | suzuka | synth | taco, | tail | tattoo | tattoos | tauren | tauren, | temperatureplay | tentacle | tentacles | tenticles | tess | tetsuo | thighhighs | three | threesome | threesome, | threeway | thromalis | thunderbluff, | tiefling | tifa | tina | tit | tit-fuck | tits | tongue | top, | topless | torment | toys | toys, | tram | trap | tree | tribadism | triple | troll | troll, | trolls | tseer | tseer, | turtle | tvse | tyliel | tyranids | undead | undead, | undertones | underworld | up | vagina | valentines | vashj | vibrate | vibrator | vilanda | vip | voidwalker | vs | wacraft | wallpaper | warcraft | warcraft, | warcraft. | warhammer | warlock | warlock, | warlocks | warrior | wars | water, | wave | way | weed | welf | well | werewolf, | wet | whitemane | wing | wings | winter | wizard | wolf | woman | woman, | women | wonder | woods | worgen | world | worm | wow | wow, | wrap | wtf | wyrm | wyrmling | xex | xexi | xexilia | xi | yaoi | yiff | yuna | yuri | zack | zelda | zerg | zombie | zomby


Just wanna pick out a few things here... first off, [beast], abomination, bestiality, bigbewbs(wtf), boy, breed, cobra(...), cobras(?!), cow (wtf), doggy (please God no), dreania (wtf), eggs, gnoll, gnome, gore, horse (right next to hot for reasons the alphabet is going to appeal), incest, infernal (wtf), kittens (WTF?!), lizards, ooo, palmer (say from FF7 and I shoot), plants, poison, popabear (wtf), rape, ravager (ARGH!), saber, saberfang, sapphiron, submarine (wtf), superman (wtf?), turtle (wtf?), tyranids (i don't even wanna know), woolf, worgen, worm, and finally, what the fuck is a zomby?

In any case, I hope the majority of this community lacks male sets of genitalia. Because, well, you're not going to find many dicks here.

Just a whole bunch of lesbians. So, if you're female, love World of Warcraft, motorcycles, wear flannel and sport a mullet, this just might be the jerkoff spot for you!


There are several redeeming features to all this porn, though.

Demon hunters getting fondled.

The two good pictures-- Lady Vashj lezzing up a female version of Illidan, and but of course a female demon hunter lezzing up a blood elf female.

Speaking of which: it's about time somebody drew Vashj porn! I thought I was the only one having Mermaid Problem fantasies about her!

Well, apparently not.

ADULTS ONLY

I swear. I don't mind being heckled, or being linked to.

I mind the kids streaming in.

So, I'd say this: if any of you who're linking to this are reading this, please, quit it. I'd rather have you not expose children to this sort of thing.

If you'd like to link, use icze4r.org. That, at least, has a warning page.






It always amazes me what the hell people will jerk off to.

So I'm back at Darknest. Home of the Whopper-- and, also, World of Porncraft.

Man.

First of all: game porn brings about very, very strange fetishes.

Footjobs. Also, I'm a bit concerned that there are ten thousand keywords for things that are either borderline illegal or just plain creepy.

Examples: [beast], beast, bestiality, boy (?!), doggie, doggy, incest, horse, jungle, necro, owlbeast (why?) and pet. (Probably others. I'm bored.)

There are also ten thousand misspelligns of Draenei.

That's fine and everything-- people can be creepy as long as they do it legally-- but, every other picture is a pet fucking somebody.

"Hey! Blood elf harem OH MY GOD"

Perfectly good pictures of blood elf women with dicks ruined by A GODDAMN TIGER.

I never liked hunter pets. They fucking ruin EVERYTHING!


If you've never gone-- and I'd recommend you don't, as, since this page has been plastered alllll over my server's forums, and you're most likely not even fucking old enough to read this-- it's quite amazing.

What do you think World of Porncraft is mostly about?

Night elves?

Well, you're half right. Trolls, too-- as trolls are the Horde version of Night Elves.

Apparently, when it comes to WoW porn, people tend to use the following things:

1.) Females

Understandably, not a whole lot of males in this.

2.) Hermaphrodites and Shemales

Because, if you're interested in World of Warcraft, and you're interested in porn for it, you're probably interested in hermaphrodites and shemales.

Present company included. Really, it's just something that comes with the genre, and yes, it is fucking weird.

I accept small levels of it, but some people get really fucking into it.

3.) Animals

People tend to mix fetishes like fools mix liquor. This is the result.

4.) Incest

Like I just said...

5.) Gnomes

AAAARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!


Basically, if you took five random WoW porn pictures, you'd end up with:

1.) Night elf twins blowing a shemale orc
2.) Gnomes having sex
3.) One race having an orgy with hunter pets
4.) A stupid picture talking about "ganking"
5.) A naked tauren female

Then if you took a sixth one, you'd end up with something by Drake Fenwick.

Really, it's odd.


Oh, and did I mention the rape?

I'd love to quote Greg Behrendt here-- actually, paraphrase him, and say, "Ooh, the" rape "is muy bueno", but, it isn't.

It's really quite disturbing.

Hey, look! It's Selanaar!

Getting raped by [blank]!

At least it's not too imaginative.


Really, there is some good to it.

Forgetting all the hunter pets raping and being simulated to look like they're licking character models' netherregions, forgetting all the really badly drawn shit that's here-- even forgetting that there are nearly 50,000 people here and it feels like going to a barely-legal porn convention--

There's Drake Fenwick.

I've always liked Drake. I love his comic, Supermegatopia.

While sometimes, he's not exactly on my page-- he comes up with such wonderful things to dream about.

Like, crossbreeding a night elf and an ogre to make a giant, really cute night elf.

That's something to dream about.


While that's nice, then we have, on the other end, the drowned mage.

Just a picture of the model of a human female (mage, apparently), photoshopped to be naked.

I don't get it.


Out of all of it, however, there are some good pictures. Even x-rated ones-- the ones that come to mind would be the priest mindcontrolling an undead...

... and, yeah. That's about it. Most of the good pictures are relatively g-rated productions. That's cool, though.

However, before I go, I would like to make a request.

Stop that asshole who draws dicks the size of the women themselves (IN THE WOMEN AS WELL) from drawing. Please. We hear he's a talented artist, but the motherfucker is Salvador Dali with an attitude problem.



... for some reason, there are pictures tagged "kittens".

... why?

...

... I don't even wanna know.

You people scare the living shit out of me.

Alright, let's go over this.

For starters: World of Porncraft.

I like porn.

I like Warcraft.

They go together rather nicely.

But, I have a question.


Who... the fuck... spends their time photoshopping horses in the game to fuck human females in the game?

And dogs-- what the fuck is with all the dogs fucking the human females from the game in these pictures? (The dogs are the in-game WoW models, mind you.)

There's a picture where a human female is getting fucked up some hole in her ass and is blowing a SFK Werewolf.

I understand blowing werewolves.

I can dig that.

Oh, shit, I can REALLY dig that.


Where was I going with this?

Oh, yeah--

The dog.

Why the dog?

Werewolves, yes. Dogs, no! No! No no no no no! And no again!

And people don't just go, "Oh, that's fucking terrible," or, "Jesus H. Christ what the fuck is wrong with you?".

They say, instead, things like: "Hey, you got the dog's feet wrong!"

At least they have some Drake Fenwick in there.

That always rules.


I'm going to go cry now.